Abilene paradox

[ciphergoth]

Just randomly found this on Wikipedia: Abilene paradox - the possibility that a group decision will be made for X even though every single person in the group would prefer Y. This is a familiar situation to me, and I'm sure that's usual. It can be hard to express a preference weakly - you say "I'd slightly prefer not to get starters", and no matter how many caveats I put on that, it's rare that anyone is prepared to say "well, I really like their spring rolls so I would like to get starters if everyone else is OK".

On the other hand, it's kind of a good problem to have - I'd rather these problems than have everyone fighting to put their own needs ahead of everyone else's...

Comments

[hamsterine.livejournal.com]

Interesting that so many people recognise this. I don't remember experiencing this myself really. I've been in a situation where I actually wanted to do X initiallu but it was crap, & I still said I liked it to be polite.

I don't think I'd say I want to do something if I don't. I might downplay how much I don't want to a little bit, ie "I'd be happy just to stay in, but if you want to go thats fine too."