The hits keep coming.

Apr. 19th, 2019 12:11 pm
vvalkyri: (Default)
[personal profile] vvalkyri
Back on April 5, it seems, I started looking for an email address that had been passed along to me back in the summer, and that somehow I'd screwed up on following up on. I'd been in touch with folks from Mom's class, and they'd sent something out on the listserv and we were were still in the middle of putting together a flyer to have up at Reunion.

What I didn't find at the time was the email address, but what I did find was a lost connection with a guy Mom had known when they were teens, who still had pictures of her, and who left off on emailing me when I wasn't dealing well with replying with much, likely because back then my phone wasn't at all good at taking dictation.

I'd tried to follow up, and he died in August.

I sent to the original people to ask about the email address for Mom's friend, and tried again some days later, and they sent me info for someone else I already knew.

Today I learned that Joan White, later Sister Theresa, whose name I remembered back last year, died some time in the last few days. I've no idea why I never found the earlier email thread.

Damn it.

(no subject)

Apr. 18th, 2019 02:04 am
vvalkyri: (Default)
[personal profile] vvalkyri
all of this is so effing hard right now.

when I have Brain I realize how much I fscked up when I didn't have Brain.

And I need Brain to write stuff and answer stuff and argh.

Edit: and the little antique store in Budapest just noticed and liked my review of it in which I mention that my parents will love the porcelain bird. I am not entirely sure what I did with said bird, and had forgotten about said bird because I was sick shortly after I returned from the trip until my rescheduled trip down to FL that final time, and not only did I forget about the bird but part of why I took so very many pictures was to be able to show him, and even possibly her (she likes globes and I took LOTS of pics at the globe museum) and I never showed them.

and now im kinda crying.

Surely she's not going to....

Apr. 17th, 2019 08:01 pm
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[personal profile] flick
TWWOTV has been having fairly extensive building work done inside her house, as part of which they stripped out all the loft insulation (we could tell, because they stuffed the porch full of it to get it out of the way).

When I took Bob out for his walk today, I noticed that it had all been brought outside and piled in a big heap. Just where she typically has her bonfire pile.

"Surely she's not going to..." I thought, snapping a quick picture of it just in case. I had a quick google when I got home, and found various reassuring stuff about it being fire retardant, and thought no more of it.

A few hours later, I was doing a bit of cleaning and, as it was warm, opened the back door to let some air in. A few minutes later, an utterly revolting smell drifted in.

Yup, she did. Massive rolling clouds of yellow-brown smoke were pouring past the house. Is that safe? Is that legal? Is that the builders driving off as quickly as they can like sensible people?

Called 999. Took them an alarmingly long time to find our address on their system. They were only interested in the 'on fire' aspect of things, and whether there was anyone looking after it. When I said that the builders had gone and I couldn't see anyone nearby, they sent a fire engine and told me to call Environmental Health.

Called Environmental Health, who located us much more quickly (presumably using the magic of Google). Fire Engine arrived, and EH said to call back when they'd gone / not gone. Fire Engine left, so presumably she was home and just got a telling off. Called EH, who said "I'm on my way". Called New Mrs Up The Hill and told her to 1) get the kids indoors and 2) to call her local EH as well (she got the out-of-hours and left a message).

Fifteen minutes later, Bob exploded and I opened the front door to find a pleasant-looking man there. "That was quick!" I said, and got a confused look from our local councillor who was out canvassing. We had a chat (very diplomatic: "I'm ignoring the national party issues right now and just focussing on the local elections"), he said he'd look into a couple of things for me, he went on his way.

The wind shifted slightly. The smoke was now blowing Up The Hill, rather than at us. The EH guy arrived, and spent quite a while muttering ("stupid... inconsiderate... rude... why would you...") before rather apologetically saying that as the wind had shifted away from our house he couldn't do anything but tell the Up The Hill EH guy what he'd seen.

And I still have no fucking clue what breathing in smoke full of chemicals and laced with microscopic glass shards will do to me, the dog, the horses, the ducks and -- most worryingly -- the ducklings. Hey ho.

(no subject)

Apr. 17th, 2019 12:23 pm
vvalkyri: (Default)
[personal profile] vvalkyri
Damn it. I keep second-guessing. I thought I was okay with paid death notice and web page route and then last night I was looking through a Sunday paper I had around - unlike the 'of notes' near my mom's 'of note' the ones that week really did seem to tell their story.

(no subject)

Apr. 17th, 2019 10:36 am
sigmaleph: (Default)
[personal profile] sigmaleph
are there people who have their inner monologue in the third person?

i ask because i was reminded of this trope in TG fiction where the narration goes 'he thought it was about time he accepted his change and started think of herself as she' or something and then the narration switches pronouns as though this reflects a change in inner monologue and like. how. is this how the author's brain works.

(the general case of this is pretending the narration corresponds one-to-one with what's going on inside the PoV character's head, which is still weird in first person narration but much less so)

i am an actual trans person who thinks in two gendered languages and i can't even tell when i started switching adjectives from gendered-male to gendered-female in my Spanish inner monologue, the question of what third person pronouns i use inside my head for myself is meaningless

Labyrinth Roleplaying, Sessions 2, 3

Apr. 17th, 2019 01:36 pm
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[personal profile] jack
What Went Well

Playing some DnD where building an effective character and achieving things effectively actually matters has been very nice. I don't want to play that style too much, it's a big investment of effort, but I was missing it.

The mechanics for navigating an expansive underground maze worked almost perfectly. It really feels like feeling your way through routes you partially know but might shift any time. And generating a big batch of layout and bringing it up as people stumble across it has been very satisfying.

The characters and players are really great. The inquisitive, acquisitive, goblin. The impulsive, swashbuckling cat-bard. The dour blood hunter. The rogue with a mysterious history. The players have generally been great even though I didn't know them well before.

I've had lots of lovely ideas which have gone into sessions.

Playing a not-too-long session every too weeks has gone reasonably.

What Didn't Live up to Expectations

As always, my skills cat-herding players to turn up, and making sure everyone's clear on what's going on, have been a bit rusty.

The sessions have all been quite slow, partly because I've been getting used to the sort of prep that works well in this kind of campaign, and partly just because there's a lot of players, and everyone is still getting used to what their characters can do.

All the sessions left me feeling a bit like they were missing something but I wasn't sure what. That's not unexpected when I try to run a sort of game I haven't run before, but after some thought I think I got some idea.

One problem is, a dnd game is typically a stream of small decisions: explore the hut or the cave? talk or fight? search casually or thoroughly? Often not even decisions spelled out, but formed implicitly from what the players naturally do. In this game, my hope is that the choice of routes through the labyrinth would often serve in this role, but because progress has been slower than I hoped, most of the navigation decisions haven't really had a lot of decision to make.

Also, because I started off planning broadly, a lot of the individual things the characters encounter in one session are less well fleshed through than they might otherwise be, if I'd spent prep time thinking through what they were most likely to meet specifically. I've been doing more of this, even though it's more prep, but only needed to "top up" the places they're most likely going next, and hopefully can be reused if I use the same setting in future.

And there just haven't been enough NPCs who've often brought games to life. The idea was, NPCs in the castle would interact with the PCs in advance, through rumours and quests offered, and slowly build up a relationship. But so far, every delve has taken multiple sessions, and it's taken two sessions to complete what I intended as the original starter goal, so no-one has had time to pursue "extra" leads. I need some more of this to happen in session so people engage with it more, even if that takes time.

Dnd games that I've run well have always had fights designed well enough to be somewhat interesting, but have been brought to life by the ideas and npcs, the richness of the immediate setting as I've spent lots of prep time dwelling on it, and the characters have interacted with NPCs and environments in unexpected ways that have worked out because I've fleshed out characters and places to explore even if I wasn't sure if they'd be able to or not. I always used to think of myself as really analytical and less creative, so it's an adjustment to realise that's something that I can count as a success, and should expect to build up and rely on. But Liv's face when I talked about adding more NPCs made me realise it was well worth it.

Looking forward to

If possible, bringing more of the lore I worked out to the fore, it's been surprisingly hard to make it relevant, but it's come up a few times so I hope that works out.

Running a second group in the same setting, and seeing how they interact with the same spaces. And using the weirdness of the labyrinth to justify it if it seems like sometimes they leave somewhere in an impossible chronological order because of the order of the sessions :)

No Responsibility Saturdays

Apr. 17th, 2019 01:11 pm
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[personal profile] jack
I've recently been experimenting with "no responsibility saturdays". I've toyed with similar things before, but partly I hadn't reached a point where the trade-offs were useful to me, and partly I think I tried variants that didn't draw the line on what to exclude in the right place.

Specifically, my rule is, I can do anything I feel like, be it collapsing in front of the TV, playing games with Liv, getting on with a hobby project, going out to socialise or walk, exercise, or catching up on a behind todo list. But stuff I *need* to do, I'll set aside time some other time, so I don't have anything I *have* to do.

Mostly, it's a rule that says I can ignore the voice in my head saying, "oh, but you really need to do X, you shouldn't do other stuff until you've done that". Which, well, maybe I should ignore that most of the time, The Voice isn't very good at choosing the right things to worry about. But I've always found it really hard to let go, and this helps.

It hasn't made that much difference to what I've actually been doing, I've done some social things I knew I would enjoy, I've enjoyed time with R, I've done tidying, I've done books and tv. But I've felt a *lot* more relaxed about it.

I guess "not have to do anything" is what weekends are supposed to be, and I just got the message late. But I always struggled with that: even when I didn't actually do much, it always felt like I *should* be doing something, that if I had time I should make the most of it by doing something really fun, or I should deal with one of hundreds of things I should "get to one day", or if I'm not doing that I should start a new project of some sort, etc, etc. I always felt like I had to do *everything*, so I tended to do *nothing*.

I had to get over several hurdles to get to the point where I could try this. Likely I will get to the point where I don't *need* to do it. But in the meantime it's been surprisingly helpful, not just for that day, the uplifted spirits have carried over to more of the week too.

(no subject)

Apr. 17th, 2019 08:09 am
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[personal profile] sigmaleph
current arc of Ward is good, i approve

previous arc was not bad but i had to workmy way through it

Naming things is hard

Apr. 17th, 2019 12:16 am
ilzolende: drawing of me, framed with L10a140 link (Default)
[personal profile] ilzolende

TFW you can think of lots of tangentially related naturally occurring objects and phenomena you'd be happy to name your OC after, but it turns out all of those objects and phenomena have pretty modern names which are themselves recognizably derived from things you don't want to name your OC after.

Opal is a pretty cool name. Trying to derive a name from Lechatelierite would just get you something like "Le Chatelier", and Manganvesuvianite is a bit of a clunker.

And in theory you could name a character after an object or phenomenon if it doesn't have an obvious name it comes from, but while humans in real life can sound realistic with names like "Lucy" and "Crystal" and "Hunter" and such, coining names that are this blatantly corresponding-to-things won't work very well.

wildeabandon: A silhouette in the dark, with the text "So tired of being here" (tired)
[personal profile] wildeabandon
The last couple of days I've been trying to fit some chin-ups into my exercise routine, to start building strength again, and probably not unrelatedly I've had a bit more upper back/neck/shoulder pain than I sometimes do. I'm currently hoping that reason I'm awake after only about three hours sleep is that pain waking me up and not insomnia brought on by the increased dose of my ADHD meds. (I do think this is reasonably likely, since I got off to sleep with very little difficulty).

I shall hold off on doing any more chin-ups for a while and see if the sleep gets better once the aches fade, and in the meantime I shall start doing some pilates again, which I've been neglecting, and then try again once I've built up a bit more core strength.

I did feel quite a lot more focused and productive yesterday, so whilst that may just be normal fluctuations or placebo effect, if it is the result of the drugs I would really like it if the effective dose wasn't also a dose that gives me ongoing insomnia...

(no subject)

Apr. 16th, 2019 05:08 pm
vvalkyri: (Default)
[personal profile] vvalkyri
Been seeing some interesting commentary about Notre Dame, ranging from thoughts about how buildings were generational efforts to how cathedrals are oft rebuilt multiple times to thoughts about how sometimes cathedrals are so long in the building that they're already falling apart in places before they're done. There's a fascinating post about that I'd like to share later.

I think one of the most intriguing posts I've run across was on a Burning Man group, where a few people suspected they had very different thoughts from the norm, what with having watched multiple Temple Burns. For one that was especially strong, because his first view of Notre Dame coverage was a closeup of the burning wooden spire. And hence his first thoughts went to the Temple, and "nothing is permanent, be in the present, enjoy the fleeting beauty around you."

I've given a lot more thought to the Washington Post obit question. Given how they treated Dad back in the mid 90s and given that searching prior coverage would be one of the ways any news obit would be researched (especially this late in the game) it's probably best to leave it be. An 'of note' at a couple paragraphs isn't long enough to delve into anything, but it's also very much exactly what SM was saying about 'nothing could do him justice.' I think I'm going to just go the death notice route. There's no deadline on that - I did it for Mom's yartzeit.


I can't help but feel like I've failed, like maybe it would have been possible to finesse.

But there are people willing to spread word when I want word spread, and choosing a site where people can gather is a good start.

And to further honor Dad's memory, I need to get back to the next stage for his book.

(no subject)

Apr. 16th, 2019 12:50 pm
vvalkyri: (Default)
[personal profile] vvalkyri
I'm feeling very conflicted about Washington Post. I can't decide how I feel about there being no news obit. The Post also does the little "of note" things, which are simply a couple paragraphs. I could still ask for one of those today. No risk of that going into the weeds about how they tried to push him out. There was reason to mistrust a real news obit with them - their prior coverage buried halfway through a long article a paragraph about the settlement, the settlement where those trying to push him out honestly lost badly - they dropped their complaint about his clerk helping SM, leave totals were adjusted to 24 weeks owed instead of 25, they paid him $187 of incorrect travel expenses (throwing that in was why he couldn't pull political help from The Hill), he agreed not to sue them, and not included in the Post's followup article, but per the law clerk they also paid $50k of legal fees.


I think in a lot of ways I'm done, but I'm also sad. Billy tells me that when he has tried to talk with SM it's through sobs. I do believe her that Dad didn't trust a news obit not to bring back the stuff from the 90s. I just wish there'd been real conversation about it. Or that it had felt possible to talk with Dad about these things myself. Or that I had thought to start looking into all this before he died.

I think one lesson learned is that trying to work other people into decision processes is a bad idea.

I also wish I'd called Ed (Dad's law clerk) far earlier. Maybe the NYTimes would have panned out in that case. He apparently left a voicemail on 3/18, but then tried again on Thursday. And I wouldn't have been running around everywhere on my birthday and reliant on him to try to convince them.

I can also put a paid announcement in the Post, and that autocreates a Legacy.com page. For $80 it seems to keep the guestbook open in perpetuity.

Or I've been offered putting up a page.

As it is, I've spent well over an hour today trying to decipher a tweet about epistemological violence. This is how my brain works.

(no subject)

Apr. 16th, 2019 08:30 am
sigmaleph: (Default)
[personal profile] sigmaleph

hmm maybe i should go back to duolingo/wanikani. my previous reason for dropping them was that I overcrowded my schedule; it is currently undercrowded, which means flailing for things to do that are constructive/rewarding and not too draining. which this might be!

we'll see how it shakes out with all the other things i keep considering adding to my schedule

(no subject)

Apr. 15th, 2019 08:04 pm
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[personal profile] sigmaleph

Game of Thrones is back, which means me being incredibly pissy about Game of Thrones on tumblr is back! I will be posting episode discussions on [tumblr.com profile] asofiaf for season 8, and the first one went live earlier today. Enjoy! or don't!

(no subject)

Apr. 15th, 2019 01:21 pm
vvalkyri: (Default)
[personal profile] vvalkyri
I think everyone here have more animosity toward stepmother than I do.
I'm more sad.


Cheryl, on the other hand..

Busy growing

Apr. 15th, 2019 05:04 pm
flick: (Default)
[personal profile] flick
The ducklings and us!





This morning, the ducklings were already outside when I went to let the ducks out. Sigh. I guess the duck house door isn't quite duckling proof. We got them sorted out, and they immediately dived on their food, so I guess they went out because they were hungry.

We've had a busy day in the garden: Mike set up the irrigation system for the polytunnel, and mowed the lawn, and I assembled supports for the peas and beans, some of which we then planted out. It's amazing how much better the soil is in that bed compared to last year, but that's what happens when you put a nice layer of horse manure on and leave it to the worms over the winter.

We've rearranged the veg garden this year, so that we can fence part of it off and keep the muscovies away from the legumes. Fingers crossed.
vvalkyri: (Default)
[personal profile] vvalkyri
The good: acro and dance and arnold memorial and games. also apparently keith and i were the last outsiders to see arnold )

Oh and Thursday I got together with cousin Shana and then went out to the blues, and they birthday jammed me and that was a good night too.


I forget what I did with Wednesday. I had a lot of lost days.

That out of the way (I don't remember when I last actually wrote) the bad:

Back on Tuesday I'd made sure to write the "here's what I composed to [coop apartment building] and here's some different pictures which would you like to use" and sent that to Stepmother and Billy, for Billy to be able to talk with her about it, which he'd said he'd intended to do later that night. Late that night I also forwarded to Cheryl, Stepmother's friend. Next day I texted Cheryl that she had email.

Some time in the next days I left a vmx for Cheryl; hell if I know exactly what I said, but it was probably about stepmother not being particularly communicative and I'm running into a deadline re wash post and was hoping you could talk with her about some of this.

Friday midday (my actual birthday, yo) right in and around my getting rained out, I get the text from Billy that he's finally gotten around to talking with Stepmother: chatlog with billy, in which he tells me what SM's thoughts are about obit/condo/etc and i'm frustrated with how long this took )

So that was lovely. I'd spent a lot of time on the phone with Dad's old law clerk on Thursday, as well as the guy who succeeded Dad. And the former had been in contact with NYTimes, who asked that we send justification for why they should write something. He'd first left a vmx back the 18th, but then found someone else to contact a few days prior. And I'd just verified with the Post that I had another couple days.

Because I hadn't ever gotten the conversation I was hoping for, to think these things through.

Post had indeed reported that he'd cleared his name, but buried it in an article about him stepping down. Law Clerk says that reporter's no longer around. Also that they missed that his legal fees had been paid by the administration. Also that Sec of Labor had later emailed that he'd not been aware of what they'd tried to do.

Soyeah, I still had my misgivings.

Except I feel very strongly that a news obit is warranted.

I'm less pissed about it all now, but I'm still pretty pissed at how fscking long it took anybody to talk with her to suss any of this out. And that I've /still/ not had any verbal contact with her in the 28 days since Dad died.

I'm way less pissed with Stepmother than the others.


And so then
Later on Friday, just before I meet up with BadM I look at my email and I've got an email back from Stepmother. On Wednesday I'd gotten a note from her about checking out Walmart and looking forward to Aldi and the doctor says how she's feeling is to be expected etc, and I hadn't figured out what to say back, because it was the most normal email i'd ever gotten from her and I hadn't really had any time to get back to it in part because Ed the Law Clerk told stories for 2 hours and 15 min when he called Thursday mid morning.

stepmother sent a note that her friend cheryl had told her I thought she was combative, and she doesn't think she's been combative and is weirded out especially since she'd been opening up personally. i sent a note of what on earth and no i haven't found you combative and dunno maybe garbled voicemail. )
And of course I have trouble sleeping Friday night because WTF. And it's all complicated anyway because a better relationship with Stepmother means potentially having her be my problem when she needs help.

I eventually realize that most likely I'd said 'uncommunicative' in the voicemail and that was misheard. Joy.

So today I decide to text Cheryl, who I already didn't trust but WTF-ing Fsck. For a reminder to the reader, she's the one who called me to tell me Dad had died, who I had to message from Talya's phone before she started replying to texts (pretty sure she'd blocked me some months prior after picking a fight with me for no reason I could quite divine) and who had had this conversation with me several weeks back when I was unblocked:

Me: Mar 22 4:48 PM the friday after Dad died; no response to message on the day
... Prob should talk with Jean about notice/obit in the Post up here, also informing Harbour Square. Can do these things but don't want to do so without some coordination. Also I don't know if he has an in memory charity. Should look to see if fsh maybe. And is there a funeral home site or a place people can post memories? His page isn't set up for that. I suppose I could create a Remembering page/group. Will talk with cousin.

Cheryl: Mar 22 4:48 PM
Definitely talk with Jean these are her decisions. You setting up a separate memory page/group would be a great idea. Jean would know of his favorite charity.

Me: Mar 22 5:05 PM
Have gotten some pictures from her but no words.

Cheryl: Mar 22 5:20 PM
Try emailing her. She knows of your message to me now.
I'll speak with funeral home tomorrow

Me: Mar 22 5:24 PM
Ok.
Do y'all have a timeline in mind for Florida stuff?

Cheryl: Mar 22 5:42 PM
No. [SM] does not have a date now.

Me: Mar 22 8:28 PM
Ok. Sounds like I can cancel next week's flights and mostly figure I can make early April plans?
(outside FL)

Cheryl: Mar 22 8:55 PM
[SM] has not made plans for either location now.

Cheryl: Mar 22 9:31 PM
You need to email [SM]. I have forwarded her your texts


Me: Mar 22 9:43 PM
Thanks. I do not have Brain to compose email just now but will figure I can make DC plans the next few weeks and probably birthday plans for the 12th.

Cheryl: Mar 22 10:27 PM
I'll see [stepmother] tomorrow

...and then later that evening I found the 'you do have my email address...right?' email from Stepmother, in reply to an email I'd sent a couple days prior, asking about a picture she'd sent.

Me: Mar 25 7:28 PM
Thanks. Any news?

Cheryl Mar 25 7:31 PM
None yet.

Me: Wednesday 11:42 AM
Hey... Forwarded an email to you. When is a good time to talk?

the email forwarded had been the 'hey i've composed this to go out to the building, and here are a few pics to choose between.'



So there's the stage. Recent interaction hadn't been particularly useful, but hadn't been completely wtf. And to remind the reader, since this is already incredibly long, "cheryl tells me that you said I am being 'confrontational.'

Soyeah. Today I text Cheryl. Not only did it not go well, but WTFing Fsck.

(Oh, and I also, earlier, had spent some time on the phone with someone else in FL, who doesn't trust Cheryl and won't be in the same space as Billy, and also wasn't completely firing on all cylinders because she seemed unable to retain that i'm dealing with them because I'm not able to get any answers from Stepmother and OMFG uncertainty is one of the things that drives me batshit. I spend a lot of time getting mad at people and apologizing of late. And what seems to set me flying off the handle is people not getting what I think I've been clear about, which is a pretty inconvenient state of affairs as most likely i'm not clear. Or perhaps they're not listening. Or have insufficient context)

It did not go well:
Me: Sunday 3:08 PM
Recent email from Jean implies there has been some miscommunication between you and me. When can you and I talk?

Cheryl: Sun 3:08 PM
No miscommunication. Jean listened to your voice mail message and words. She hears, sees and reads all communication I receive and send with and to you.

Me: Sun 3:10 PM
in that case, maybe you need to listen to it with her again.

Because the email I got from her was that you had said that I said she was being 'combative.'.

I do not remember exactly what I said on your voicemail but I can assure you I have not even thought the word 'combative.'.

I can imagine having said something about her being uncommunicative, which, in the circumstances, was/is completely understandable and I would have thought I would have included that too as why I was hoping you and she might speak.

Thank you for responding so quickly. It's been a source of great stress for the last several days.

Cheryl: Sun 3:21 PM
Don't need to listen again [Vval]. Enough

Me: Sun 3:22 PM
Cheryl, somehow either garbled voicemail or miscommunication between you and Jean left her thinking I thought she was being combative. I said no such thing, and have thought no such thing.

I have welcomed what interaction she and I have had this month, and I very much would like to clear up this painful miscommunication, so I am glad you will be showing her this text.

Thanks,

[Vval]

Cheryl: Sun 5:35 PM
And keeping your voice mail. Take care

Me: Sun 5:36 PM
If you can figure out how to forward voicemail to me I'd appreciate.


... and then at about 20 to midnight I got a plethora of messages all at once stretching back to maybe 6pm Saturday, so I don't know whether this was somewhere near the above or later:
Cheryl: ???
[Vval]. She can listen. Some day you will understand what the word "enough" means


It's of course fully nuts that i've spent this much time writing about all of this. It's been a whole hour, and I could and should have gone to bed ages prior. As of Friday I was already far more annoyed with BIlly and Cheryl than Stepmother, but at this point I'm not only pissed, but feeling helpless, as well as in bizzarro world.

I'm seriously thinking of sending Stepmother the chatlog.

I'm not minding dropping the Post, except that NYTimes is probably going to say no. Which is unfortunate, as the whistleblower and worker protections angle could be really cool.


Oh lovely. Email's come in just now from Stepmother. I'm debating reading it. Will it be understanding or escalation?
Fuck it. I'll read it and copy it here, and try to go to bed 'cause it's 3am.

Ok, good that I looked; composing a reply to

I'm sorry you are stressed. I am stressed also. Apart from being unable to think of much other than Nahmie's and my last few hours together, I am doing income tax. Have you ever done income taxes..?


I guess Cheryl showed her the interaction as promised.

I'm still wtf.

edit: Argh, it's 4a. I spent so much time dithering about how much to say on little things that replying quickly isn't there anyway.

edit: 4:52 am. man i spent a lot of time editing and reediting a story about taxes. Probably should have left it to morning but then I would have had to have a different signoff than that the birds were chirping and must bed.

I wish my ear would stop hurting. oddly i think the pressure has more to do with my neck than my sinuses.

I asked on FB about memorial sites. There've been a bunch of comments and an offer to put one up. I think what I'll do is get a death notice in some time soon and mention a memorial site and hope people add memories to that.

hm. well i thought it was good to look and respond when it came in but i thought i'd take 10 min not 2 hrs.

Also been reading about emotional exhaustion.

Which probably explains a lot.

Edit: I am also realizing that I am way less angry with SM than my readers are at this point. She's newly widowed after 30+ years, and wasn't doing great before that. I took her most recent email to mean she'd accepted that I didn't find her combative, however the hell that notion took hold.

(no subject)

Apr. 13th, 2019 09:04 pm
vvalkyri: (Default)
[personal profile] vvalkyri
Thinking to picnic before the meridian park acro jam. Think 15th and Euclid, walk south a bit.

Dunno, 2ish?

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Paul Crowley

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