The Puppy-Oil Cannon

from kalischild via jwz

The Puppy-Oil Cannon
by John Hawkins

In the Gulf War and Afghanistan, the US military spent an inordinate amount of money and effort dislodging enemy soldiers who took cover in caves and bunkers. Today the Pentagon unveiled a new siege breaking weapon designed to solve that problem; the 'Puppy-Oil Cannon'. In response to a reporter's question, General Tommy Franks explained how the 'Puppy-Oil Cannon' works.

"Basically we dump bags of puppies we get from pounds across the US into a large vat of oil. They're then sucked into a giant cannon that fires them at the enemy. Soon thereafter the oil starts to dry and become sticky and so what you end up with is a group of enemy soldiers covered with dead puppies."

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(Update for unrelated footnote: cool that a picture of me can generate so many comments!)