Do men make the first move?
Oct. 6th, 2011 08:24 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
Reading this fascinating comment thread on Greta Christina's blog:
The stories told there seem somewhat American, even when they're from the pansexual, BDSM Bay Area. How does it work in our community, when a man and a woman hook up?What counts as “the first move”?Fair question. I would say “the first overt, unambiguous, verbal move.” I.e., asking someone out, or otherwise making a move that can’t be interpreted as anything other than a move, and that requires an overt response. (The point being that if you toss your hair at someone and they ignore you, you can save face and pretend you weren’t making a first move — but if you say, “Would you like to go out with me?”, that’s not possible, and you have to accept the possibility and indeed the likelihood of overt rejection.)